Father teaching son how to garden — Being a Dad is the best job in the world.

You might ask: Is being a father worth it? What are the joys of being a dad?

The current dating scene is harder for single men than when I was younger. Some men aren’t sure they even want to have kids based on their dating prospects. And it’s a lot to handle an often [angry wife] in marriage. But for counterbalance, I want to share my thoughts on being a father and why it is the best experience a man can have. Also, I want to underscore important reasons why men don’t want to miss out on the joys of fatherhood.

Success is not measured in money, nor how much you can bench press. Success is about experiencing life to the fullest and growing your soul. Becoming a father makes you evolve into a better man. A man who can savor simple, precious moments with his children despite hardships. No other masculine role is more important, and no other occupation is as gratifying.

1. Creating a Legacy

Most people won’t start a tech company, write a bestseller, or build a rocket ship. And if they do, most accomplishments won’t be monumental enough to pass one generation. Even if our names still linger on the lips of the living, do they know us? Do they carry a part of our soul?

Looking into the peace of my daughter’s sleeping face for the first time, I saw the future. I saw a part of me, maybe the best part, that would persist in her. Maybe even into her children’s lives. That’s true legacy—don’t let misled men or women fool you otherwise.

2. Reliving Childhood

Growing up as a child, everything is fun and exciting. As we age, we lose the joy of simple things like kicking a ball, riding a bike, or roasting marshmallows. Old age and maturity tend to crowd out these sweet memories. The “newness” of life wears off and there is no way of bringing it back for yourself.

When you see your child shrieking with delight while flying a kite for the first time — you feel that joy again. Parents get a chance to re-live their youth by raising and mentoring their children. It’s a second lease on some of the best times in your life, some you might not even clearly remember from your childhood.

buy us a coffee?

3. Gaining Perspective on the Cycle of Life

When you are young everything seems like a crisis, coming headlong to smack you in the face out of the blue. You hardly have the time to pull your head out of the scrum, look about, and figure out where you are. Is this my purpose? Am I doing what I should be?

Dads gain perspective and an ability to make true value assessments. Assessments between that which matters and that which does not. You realize that your experiences and thoughts are much like what your dad went through when you were a kid. Your child will tread the path you’re walking now. Everything is a great cycle of life.

I remember my dad after my grandfather died from a stroke. He talked about all the memories of his father, and how hard it was to accept his absence when he needed guidance. Then when my daughter was 10 years old, my Dad died from cancer and I had to explain that her Papa was gone. There’s still not a day that passes I don’t think about my Dad but the experience impressed upon me on lesson. Life is one great circle, a passing of joy, grief, and wonder, where key moments are relived from a different vantage point.

4. Learning Empathy

As a young man, I never learned to connect strongly with others as I tend to live in a world of doing, not feeling. After my child approached puberty, I realized girls are nothing like boys. I was unprepared for the gathering storm of teenage emotions. I had countless conversations with my daughter about her peers, and I learned. Women perceive the world very differently than men, and critiques from peers carry great weight in this world. At first, I was lost. But I still paid attention. I read articles on teenage girls' and women’s world view, and I learned to connect better. Although men start emotionally stunted, we can learn to do anything for those we love. I developed a sense of ease in expressing my emotions, without shame or awkwardness. Now empathy is another tool in the toolbelt next to the tape measure.

5. Feeling Unconditional Love

When we say we love our spouse, we think it’s unconditional, but it isn’t. If they yell at us, hurt us, lie to us, or do a host of things, we lose our sense of love. And without constant investment love will fade. These facts are incontrovertible, but the love for a child is an entirely different thing.

As a father, you can love without conditions for the first time. No matter what your child does, you will still love them. This is an experience totally unique to being a parent.

6. Wearing the Mantle of Hero

Everyone saves the day occasionally, but when was the last time someone called you a hero?

In the eyes of your child, you are their superhero for life. Even if they’re a disagreeable teenager, they still see dad as the path maker to follow. I argued with my father over trivial things, but to this day, he is my model what a man is supposed to be.

Unfortunately, the mantle of a hero comes with weight and burden. Fatherless children suffer detrimental impacts on emotional control, economic prosperity, and criminality. Their entire future hinges on your ability to lead and mentor as their father. How can you be more needed, more important than that?

Father holding daughter kissing his cheek, standing by the water's edge on a beach — Being a Dad is lifechanging.

7. Taking Pride in your Child’s Achievements

I felt pride in my family before. Seeing my dad publish his first novel despite having dyslexia. Watching my brother cross his High School Graduation as Valediction. Comforting my wife after a difficult delivery of our daughter. Yet, those feelings never held a candle to watching my daughter overcome each childhood milestone, no matter how small. Each of her achievements filled me with joyful pride and demonstrated my efforts as a parent.

8. Understanding Women Better (if you have a Daughter)

Like many single men, women have been always a mystery to me. Their emotional framework and worldview are so different than a man’s. Having a daughter, I had the opportunity to watch her grow up and develop into a young woman. I came to empathize with the female experience: the judgment from others, the weight of their opinions, and the resulting tumult of emotion. You don’t truly understand a person or thing until you get the chance to view it from different perspectives while you yourself are wearing different hats.

9. Enjoying Vivid Memories

Men’s brains assess problems, break them down, and craft a response strategy. Men’s brains do not excel at nuance. This makes men good at crisis, and bad at emotional context. Hence a man’s non-utilitarian recollection of events can tend to fade in time.

This changed when I became a father. I remember all the experiences with my child much more vividly, simply because of the emotional intensity. The memories are richer and filled with the emotions I felt at the time.

10. Striving to be the Best Man You Can

As the father, you are the trailblazer. You set the agenda and the mode of operation. You imbue a code of conduct for your children that offers guidance for the rest of their lives. To do that, fathers need to set an example of behavior for their children to emulate (they are watching). Every little act counts. The time when you stub your toe and feel the urge to curse—it counts. The time when your wife is acting ridiculous, and you want to snap at her—it counts. When you back up into somebody’s car and they aren’t there to see it---it counts! Everything you do matters.

Conclusion

Being a father is a huge responsibility. Dad acts as the protector, leader, and bellwether for the family. In exchange, he gets a legacy that will endure after him, and he gets to live life again through the eyes of his child. Fathers gain access to a world of empathy, unconditional love, and emotionality. And, if they are lucky enough to have a daughter, they can learn about how the opposite sex experiences the world. Although the burdens are great as a father, the rewards are truly life changing.

As a stellar Dad, you might be interested in some other fatherhood related articles on helping your children with anxiety, insomnia, or picky eating.
If you enjoyed this article on the Joys of Fatherhood, share it with your friends with the share links below. Also feel free to share your experiences and comments. And follow us on Facebook and Twitter X as Bonfire Brotherhood.